Was it wrong to invite all the people I work with?

I have been working in this office for alost a year. I am the youngest girls here. (there are onyl 3 females) but I have seemed to have formed great relationships witht these guys, And i love them all so much, its like having 20 fathers! :-) But thats the reason Iove my job. So I planned on inviting them all since there would only be a few I wouldnt invite, it seemed rude to leave just a few people out. But I am doing a count now (because we are over 100 people right now) And everyone I asked so far doesnt think they will be able to make it. It is an hour away. But I am still hurt that they dont want to come...I mean I know thats silly and I completely understand why they wouldnt and i dont want them to feel obligated. So now I am going to feel real stupid handing out the invitations, knowing most of them plan on not coming. Even the ones I was sure would. Was it stupid to ask everybody?
Was it wrong to invite all the people I work with?
I don't think it was stupid of you to ask. When I got married, I only wanted to invite a couple of people from my office, but I felt it would be rude to invite some, but not all. I decided to hand out invitations to everyone of my co-workers. I also knew that most of them would not come, nor did I want them to. It was more of a polite formality between two parties. Many people, even if they are friendly while at work, do not consider work relationships to necessarily span out into private life. However, it never hurts to be nice. I think you did the right thing.
Reply:if you get some to come and have a great time then count it as a success.


and quit beating yourself up that many are busy ... other people have a life and responsibilities.
Reply:Nope
Reply:No, it wasn't stupid to ask - in fact you were smart to include everyone. And try not to feel too hurt that they aren't attending. Coworker weddings are an interesting balancing act. They probably don't want to hurt you any more than you don't want anyone to feel left out. And since you are working with that many men... I'm sorry if this sounds sexist, but most men in my experience just aren't the kind to enjoy weddings.





It sounds like you haven't sent out the invites yet. If that's the case, you have a few options:





1) You give everyone the invitations and kind of expect a certain number of people not to be able to make it. That way no one feels left out, but you will be spending the money on the invitations.





2) If you are truly comfortable with these people, ask them honestly if they think they would attend. Give invitations to those who seem interested and give announcements to those who don't. Again, no one is left out that way.





3) Give everyone announcements.
Reply:It was okay to ask everyone because only 7 out of 10 will show on average. Don't worry about the head count just trust God that things will work out perfectly.
Reply:Not at all. It's the nice thing to do. Every one is equally invited and that is the right thing to do. Pass them an invitation, and let them know if they change their mind, the offer is on the table.
Reply:Naaa, just sounds like to me you throwing a sausage fest. Guys hate going to partyies with the majority of guys there. If you want the guys to go, invite more females make it even, not a sausage fest. Invite the hottest female friends you have and trust me they will go. Hey if you get more female friends to go invite me.
Reply:no. it was kind of you to invite your co-workers. when you invite people (in general), you should always keep in mind the possibility that they cannot accept your invitation. sure it's disappointing but you shouldn't take it personal. i'm sure that they were flattered that you wanted them to share your special occassion with you. remember, men typically don't go to weddings if they are not dragged along by their girlfriends/wives. don't worry about it. you'll have plenty to worry about while planning the wedding.
Reply:I think that is awesome that you invited everyone I to am getting married ( 2 1/2 weeks ) and I wanted so badly to invite everyone I work with I to get along with all of my coworkers but I already have a guest list of over 250 coming so I was not able to but I think it was not silly at all it was very kind and generous of you and I think you should still give them the invite and let them know that if they are able even at last minute you would love to have them there to share your day !! ( the cater always adds some just in case so don't worry about that ) !! O and if financially possible you might offer to pay for a rental van and the ones who wish to attend but don't want to make the drive can come complety on your dime and that makes it a little easier on them !!





Just some some of my ideas





Hope this helps





Hope you have the wedding of your dreams and an even better future !!
Reply:no its not stupid its polite. i would have done the same. i would still have the party though.
Reply:No at least they know that you like them as friends maybe you can offer an incentive if they drive that far
Reply:You were not wrong in inviting your co-workers. Don't feel bad that most won't be coming, an hour away is kind of far. Just mail the invitations to them, don't hand them out, that's a big etiquette no no. They can RSVP just like everyone else. And some of them may change their mind and come after all.
Reply:No it was not stupid to ask.


You seem to worry how people would feel if you did not invite them and that makes you a good person.


No one likes the feeling of being left out.


So what you did was commendable.
Reply:No it was not stupid. It was very polite of you to ask everyone. Who knows they may reconsider and come anyway and also, they might get you gifts.
Reply:Attending a wedding is generally reserved for people fairly close to you...friends and family...asking most (or all) of your coworkers may come across as trying to get more gifts...
Reply:invite them to what? your brothers cousins aunts ex husbands son's graduation party? no one from your work cares about that lil guy
Reply:I think it was not only polite, but considerate to ask everybody so that nobody would feel left out. And you shouldn't feel "stupid" handing out the invitations- you've done your part now the ball is in their court.
Reply:No you were not stupid in asking. You wanted to have them celebrate your happiness. Mail the invitations to them like you are others invitations. Put a note inside saying you are aware that they are not able to attend, but that you wanted them to know that you would have been honored to have them attend. Thank them for their friendship and let it end there. Also, let them know that you had just wanted them to come for celebration purposes, not for gifts, so that they don't feel as though they have to send a gift. No you were not silly in wanting to invite them, I wish I had worked in a place that I would have wanted my co-workers to attend. The place I worked I didn't want them anywhere near my wedding or reception.
Reply:no you work with them and you have to see them like everyday so really if you don't invite them they might get angry
Reply:It's a courtesy for you to hand out these invitations, so don't feel hurt that not all of them can make it!
Reply:Don't feel stupid or embarrased about inviting people you know can't come. It was great of you to give them the opportunity. Just be glad that they aren't all coming because that can get really expensive.





I didn't invite any of my co-workers (except for ones that were my friends before I worked there, and I told them to be discreet about coming). I wish I could have invited them all, but my fiance and I decided together that we were keeping the wedding small and intimate.
Reply:Most want to keep work away from social. Too much drama can result.


Hand out the invitations I hope RSVP.
Reply:Don't be so hurt. Many people only attend weddings when they know the person very well. You said you have been at that job less than a year-- that's not very long, really.