What would you do if if you were invited for dinner and Hercule Poirot was a fellow guest?

Would you make your excuses and leave? Every time the obsessive-compulsive little Belgian detective turns up one of the guests is assassinated. He's jinxed I tell you!
What would you do if if you were invited for dinner and Hercule Poirot was a fellow guest?
I can't seem to shake off the blasted fellow. I took a trip on the Orient Express recently with mumsy and the cretin was dining at the next table. Frightful busybody he is.


I went for cruise on the Nile with my school chummy Archibald Henderson Sidebottom last year and that Poirot fellow was there as well. Mind you, Sidebottom got away with murder - literally! He topped some fellow in a fit of rage during a game of backgammon, slipped a mickey finn to old Poirot which utterly confused his powers of deduction and he ended up accusing a poor innocent fellow of the murder who's now serving 40 years in an stinking Egyptian prison!


Sidebottom is such a clever chap. I'm terribly lucky to have him as a friend.
Reply:i say Lady F, one tip is during one of Lord Percy Fawcett Smythes dinner party's dont drink the wine that Lord Percy's Butler Cuthbertson serves, he is a shifty fellow i can tell you, Hercule would give him reason to poison every one, especially the way Cuthbertson is treated.


Lord Percy actually gave the fellow a blanket during the recent cold spell, now the shifty looking chap has ideas above his station.


the cheeky urchin actually looked me in the eye whilst taking my coat the other day...how dare he, a couple of lashes with ones cane soon had him back in his place.
Reply:Strangely, one of my personal kinks is for tiny Belgian detectives with enormous moustaches. Hopefully I would be able to restrain myself during dinner, but alas, who can say?


I can only pray that the dinner doesn't end abruptly when I ravish him on the dining table, amongst the best silver. Oooh Hercule!
Reply:Whilst Hercule does annoyingly inhibit progress to your boudoir by insisting all remain in the drawing room while he spouts interminable monologues, it is unfair to blame him for Mrs Humphreys鈥?excesses. The woman is quite insanely jealous of any other who comes near him, and hell hath no fury like an ex-Olympic shot-putter.
Reply:Living as I do in the little village of St. Mary-Meade, I'd bring along my neighbor, Miss Jane Marple, just to liven up the proceedings--and, I'd have Roderick Alleyn's phone number in my pocket, just in case.
Reply:I'd refrain from murdering anyone on that occasion, Lady F.
Reply:I would pull his moustache, to see if it was really him. Then run.